And so it begins...

:::I must start this post with a quick van update:::

We have received another grant for $5000 from Variety Children's Charity, thank you Jesus! There is one more grant that we are waiting on, we should hear about that late September. There have also been some donations that have come in from family members in memory of Grandma; these are so precious!

We have made the deal to trade in our van and we are on our way to finalizing everything and putting in the official order. We are so humbled to see God's hand in all of this, we are continue to trust that He has taken care of the rest of the funds needed.

:::OK now down to other business:::

Tonight is the last night I will have a preschooler, a stay child at home, a non-school aged child...to be completely candid, the thought of it kills me. Oh how the past 5 years flew by and after tonight's sleep, I have a kindergartner.

Tomorrow morning Karter and I go to his school for his first day of kindergarten. It is a 1 hour slot of time where we meet his SEA, classmates and the other teachers. Luckily, I get to stay with him for the hour. However as of Monday, he will be going half days as part of his gradual entry. We are working up to full days over the course of the next while.

I spent a good portion of time today grabbing snuggles, singing songs and praying over him. He even fell asleep on my chest for a time, that was God's precious gift to me today no doubt. I am going to miss him and I am certain that this transition is going to be harder on me than it is on him.

I would be lying if I told you I had not shed a few tears already. Actually, I fear I will be a complete mess on Monday morning. I hope I can keep the "ugly cry" composed until I reach the privacy of my van in the parking lot at very least.

I cried on Paige's first day of school, but I knew she was where she wanted to be. I knew that she was getting opportunity that I could no longer give her at home. She was making relationships that were outside of me and our home. Although I feel the same for Karter, there is an attachment that I have with him that is different. There is so much that he depends on me for and releasing that to someone else it a daunting task.

I spent a lot of the day reminiscing all the nights spent at Children's Hospital, all the milestones we have worked towards, all the hurdles Karter has overcome. And tomorrow, a new day begins, a new season emerges and we forge forward into uncharted waters. I am mixed with emotions.

Here is my prayer for you Karter

"May this year be one of amazing new beginnings, huge milestones and many days filled with smiles and laughter. I pray that your new teachers enjoy you as much as we do and that your smile and giggle become infectious to all those around you. I pray that you will be full of joy, abounding with energy so that you can attend to tasks and that you will receive new learning with a smile on your face. I pray that you will enjoy the new activities, love your new friends and teach others the way only you can. I pray protection over you for love all around you. May this year be one that you look back on as monumental!"